Today, I saw something extraordinary. It left me stunned, speechless. Today, I caught a glimpse of Pura ma'am's abnormally large behind. Pura ma'am, I believe, must be atleast as old as Methuseleh. She has seen the rise and fall of civilisations. She was there when Egypt invented the orgy, when England made fornication legal, when Madonna was still a virgin. And it is widely believed among the Kumaran student community, that Pura ma'am's behind grew to its record biggest during the last years of the iceage causing an imbalance in the distribution of mass on the earth's surface. This, infact, tilted the earth about its axis of rotation by 22 1/2 degrees leading to a large scale climatic shift. Thus ended the iceage.

The body of a mammoth was recovered recently in Greenland, frozen inside a block of ice. After extensive paleantological analysis, it has been concluded that its dying words were,"I will see you in the portals of Halifax, oh derriere grande!"