Life has been surprisingly courteous to me over the past week. Nothing outrageous to report, nothing licentious to complain about. Infact, life at present is akin to a page full of .......s. But I'm not complaining.
I was recently alerted by a dear friend of the existence of a most intriguing and amusing piece of art.I hope to acquire it in the near future. If I do, I will be sure to put a picture up for all to see. Then I will proceed to dissect its many subtleties and tear them to shreds with entirely justified derision.
Can't wait!
Yours Truly
Friday, September 29, 2006
Saturday, September 23, 2006
Something to think about, and hopefully do something about.
"Look at the cell phone. The phone has a little mineral in it called coltan. It is a capacitor that intensifies the energy that enables this little machine to send signals. Coltan is mainly mined in the eastern Congo, by thousands of people living and digging in the forest. They need meat. Therefore they eat gorillas and elephants. So your little cell phone helps kill gorillas. Then you had a cup of tea this morning. Somewhere rainforest is falling to plant more tea."
Source:
Interview with George B. Schaller, The Hindu
http://www.hindu.com/2006/09/23/stories/2006092305741100.htm
Source:
Interview with George B. Schaller, The Hindu
http://www.hindu.com/2006/09/23/stories/2006092305741100.htm
Friday, September 22, 2006
Thursday, September 21, 2006
In the Land of the Free
It seems to me, that our nation's leaders read the constitution. They read it and promptly tore it, threw the peices on the floor of their beloved parliament house and walked all over them.
Our wonderful government; the one that celebrates Rajyotsava day with great pomp and splendour every year, the one that sits in the shade of Kanteerava Stadium sipping nimbu paani and watches as primary school children sweat in the noon sun waiting to dance, sing and entertain for their majesty's pleasure; the very same government has now proposed to ban all Hindi and English songs from the radio.
In the land that we call Karnataka, the land of the free and the home of the Digs, plans to build new roads and to conserve the city's greenery never make it past the omnipresent line of shoe-throwing, pot-bellied hypocrites, but plans to remove all semblence of good music off the radio will. Without a doubt.
This really is the last straw. It is one thing to preserve our indigenous culture and language. It is another to tie us down and force it down our throats.
Forget infringement of fundamental rights. Prohibition of non-Kannada songs would force alot of successful radio stations out of business. RJ's are already leaving Bangalore for more liberal, and I dare say, more reasonable states. Economic opportunities for all?
Dude, you're off your rocker!
Our wonderful government; the one that celebrates Rajyotsava day with great pomp and splendour every year, the one that sits in the shade of Kanteerava Stadium sipping nimbu paani and watches as primary school children sweat in the noon sun waiting to dance, sing and entertain for their majesty's pleasure; the very same government has now proposed to ban all Hindi and English songs from the radio.
In the land that we call Karnataka, the land of the free and the home of the Digs, plans to build new roads and to conserve the city's greenery never make it past the omnipresent line of shoe-throwing, pot-bellied hypocrites, but plans to remove all semblence of good music off the radio will. Without a doubt.
This really is the last straw. It is one thing to preserve our indigenous culture and language. It is another to tie us down and force it down our throats.
Forget infringement of fundamental rights. Prohibition of non-Kannada songs would force alot of successful radio stations out of business. RJ's are already leaving Bangalore for more liberal, and I dare say, more reasonable states. Economic opportunities for all?
Dude, you're off your rocker!
Monday, September 18, 2006
The Experiment of Life
Objective:
To cross the bottomless pit that leads straight to Hell.
Apparatus:
A single swinging rope hanging from an unknown part of the sky.
Theory:
At the bottom of the bottomless pit { :) } lies all manner of pain and ugliness. On the other side lies the closest thing one can find to happiness.
Note:For true happiness, one must give up one's material possesions and live the life of a buddhist monk with a shaved head, dressed in a saffron rag in a mud hut bang in the middle of the Siachen glacier.
Procedure:
1. Pray a little before you begin.
2.Stand 10 feet from the ledge of the bottomless pit.
3.Wait for the swinging rope to come as possible to the edge of the abyss.
4. Take a running leap and grab hold of the oscillating rope just as it begins to swing back to wherever the hell it came from.
5. Ride it safely to the other side.
Result:
Happiness and satisfaction...or the closest one can get to it without actually giving up one's Ferrari (see theory).
Precautions:
1. Time your leap such that you don't drop into the abyss thereby sentencing yourself to burn for all eternity.
2. Do nothing to stimulate the sweat glands during the duration of the journey.
3. Do NOT look down or to the northeast.
Note: To the northeast lies the entire cast of Baywatch Hawaii.
Sources of Error:
1. One may make the mistake of reading this experiment.
To cross the bottomless pit that leads straight to Hell.
Apparatus:
A single swinging rope hanging from an unknown part of the sky.
Theory:
At the bottom of the bottomless pit { :) } lies all manner of pain and ugliness. On the other side lies the closest thing one can find to happiness.
Note:For true happiness, one must give up one's material possesions and live the life of a buddhist monk with a shaved head, dressed in a saffron rag in a mud hut bang in the middle of the Siachen glacier.
Procedure:
1. Pray a little before you begin.
2.Stand 10 feet from the ledge of the bottomless pit.
3.Wait for the swinging rope to come as possible to the edge of the abyss.
4. Take a running leap and grab hold of the oscillating rope just as it begins to swing back to wherever the hell it came from.
5. Ride it safely to the other side.
Result:
Happiness and satisfaction...or the closest one can get to it without actually giving up one's Ferrari (see theory).
Precautions:
1. Time your leap such that you don't drop into the abyss thereby sentencing yourself to burn for all eternity.
2. Do nothing to stimulate the sweat glands during the duration of the journey.
3. Do NOT look down or to the northeast.
Note: To the northeast lies the entire cast of Baywatch Hawaii.
Sources of Error:
1. One may make the mistake of reading this experiment.
Saturday, September 16, 2006
Interesting
..and quite funny actually. The following is an extract from an article in The Hindu online.
"Change is unceasing. I am told that the thumbs of modern children are evolving into ordinary fingers. As their speech reverts to grammar-free neanderthal grunts, their preferred form of communication is the text message, requiring a new digital dexterity. As we slither back down the evolutionary chain we would do well to know where we are heading."
- Simon Jenkins
Read the complete article here.
"Change is unceasing. I am told that the thumbs of modern children are evolving into ordinary fingers. As their speech reverts to grammar-free neanderthal grunts, their preferred form of communication is the text message, requiring a new digital dexterity. As we slither back down the evolutionary chain we would do well to know where we are heading."
- Simon Jenkins
Read the complete article here.
Sunday, September 10, 2006
Madness
Ah blogger, it has been too long.
What I am about to tell you may shock you. It may leave you stunned. It may cause your parasympathetic nervous system to overload and your cerebellum to capsize leaving you twitching helplessly on the floor. I find that in such cases, a strong cup of chocolate flavoured coffee helps.
When I boarded the tiny bus to Woody's, I was aware of the risk I was taking. To board the small school bus is to sign your own death warrant. The driver is mad. Every few seconds, you will see passengers bouncing off the walls and hanging from the roof by their ears. Your body will undergo a series of Gibb's energy changes leading to the superimposition of waves in the pericardial fluid. Essentially, your brain will shoot out of your ears and will be instantly devoured by the screaming kids.
Those kids are scary.
After spending 20 minutes in what I have come to believe is Dante's fifth circle of hell, we got down at Woody's. Interestingly, it was here that we concocted the worst drink the world has ever had the good fortune never to have tasted (I think there's something wrong with that sentence construction, but as I am presently high on sugar and coffee, I am unable to put my finger on it.) For those adventurous enough to try it, the recipe is as follows:
1 cup citric acid
3 spoons coffee (black)
2 spoons of panneer butter masala
1 cup coke(alternatively, one can use an equal quantity of common pesticide)
2 spoons thaingai chutney
Don't say you weren't warned.
....not one of my best posts..but give me some time. I'm out of shape.
What I am about to tell you may shock you. It may leave you stunned. It may cause your parasympathetic nervous system to overload and your cerebellum to capsize leaving you twitching helplessly on the floor. I find that in such cases, a strong cup of chocolate flavoured coffee helps.
When I boarded the tiny bus to Woody's, I was aware of the risk I was taking. To board the small school bus is to sign your own death warrant. The driver is mad. Every few seconds, you will see passengers bouncing off the walls and hanging from the roof by their ears. Your body will undergo a series of Gibb's energy changes leading to the superimposition of waves in the pericardial fluid. Essentially, your brain will shoot out of your ears and will be instantly devoured by the screaming kids.
Those kids are scary.
After spending 20 minutes in what I have come to believe is Dante's fifth circle of hell, we got down at Woody's. Interestingly, it was here that we concocted the worst drink the world has ever had the good fortune never to have tasted (I think there's something wrong with that sentence construction, but as I am presently high on sugar and coffee, I am unable to put my finger on it.) For those adventurous enough to try it, the recipe is as follows:
1 cup citric acid
3 spoons coffee (black)
2 spoons of panneer butter masala
1 cup coke(alternatively, one can use an equal quantity of common pesticide)
2 spoons thaingai chutney
Don't say you weren't warned.
....not one of my best posts..but give me some time. I'm out of shape.
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
A letter to the Taras
Voluntary warning out of good intentions and decaying logical sequences:
The following matter may be innapropriate for children, the aged, those suffering from unmitigated nasal discharge and anyone whose name is Ugranarasimha Veeralakshminarayana Bin Tughlaq. Dirty supervision is recommended.
Hail oh alpha tambrahms!
I give you much thanks for your highly enlightening medium of communication which in all its insipid glory has thrown to light new vistas of hopelessness in the complex nature of our existences.
Why yes, I did get the point, which may or may not exist, and which by following logical thought (whose own definition remains unclear), proves that our existences as complex or abstract beings is in question. Ah...the infinitely confusing and rather boring depths of existentialism. It has driven the best of us mad. Infact, just this morning, a certain person A was going into involuntary spasms over the fact that her economy-sized ego consisted entirely of displacement reactions.
I seem to be rambling, which is definitely a good thing because it leaves my mind with infinite potential to focus. That I am currently not actually focussing on anything of note is besides the point(which may or may not exist).
From your confused, slightly crazy friend,
At a cerebral frequency of 435643 Hz,
Dhadi
The following matter may be innapropriate for children, the aged, those suffering from unmitigated nasal discharge and anyone whose name is Ugranarasimha Veeralakshminarayana Bin Tughlaq. Dirty supervision is recommended.
Hail oh alpha tambrahms!
I give you much thanks for your highly enlightening medium of communication which in all its insipid glory has thrown to light new vistas of hopelessness in the complex nature of our existences.
Why yes, I did get the point, which may or may not exist, and which by following logical thought (whose own definition remains unclear), proves that our existences as complex or abstract beings is in question. Ah...the infinitely confusing and rather boring depths of existentialism. It has driven the best of us mad. Infact, just this morning, a certain person A was going into involuntary spasms over the fact that her economy-sized ego consisted entirely of displacement reactions.
I seem to be rambling, which is definitely a good thing because it leaves my mind with infinite potential to focus. That I am currently not actually focussing on anything of note is besides the point(which may or may not exist).
From your confused, slightly crazy friend,
At a cerebral frequency of 435643 Hz,
Dhadi
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